[ He raises a brow before laughing a little at her popping the bubbles. It's cute, and that affection causes him to - this time on purpose - make more of them appear. ]
I think we know where he is. It's a bit dangerous in that place, so you have to be careful, but I think if we brought some more people capable of using Dunamis... we might have an easier time. There was definitely a lot of distrust in the area. Plus, it's not protected like this island is. So we couldn't stay there too long, otherwise our emotions would be drained out... and it would probably be worse for me to gain apathy than the rest of the group.
[ She keeps lazily popping bubbles. It's been a long day, okay? But she at least knows that Nagito's good enough at Dunamis at this point to be useful. ]
Oh! [ She sits up on an elbow to look at him. It's not the important thing to talk about -- yet -- honestly she should be more worried about it, but... with him she really isn't? ] I was going to ask! If I could call you Hajime.
[ The bubbles just stop right there as his eyebrows hide in his hair, rather surprised for a moment until. . . his face turns red. The kusamochi just starts falling by the bucketload.
Ah. ]
I-If you want to, I... don't mind. Only if I can call you- [ Okay, be cool, Hinata Hajime! For once in your life. Be cool. ] Chiaki, too.
[ KUSAMOCHI FELL, EVERYONE DIED..... except no, her laughter is infectious; it makes him giggle as well. But he's also eating it now, too. ]
Ahaha, sorry about that Na-- I mean. Chiaki. [ There's more affection in that one word than anything else. How long has he yearned to call her by name? Too long. ] I'll eat all of it, don't worry. It's my favorite food, so even if we refrigerate it, it probably won't be there for very long.
[ She holds up another one, slowly uncurling as she looks the kusamochi over. Wow there are quite a lot of them. ]
I guess I know how to make them, too. It's a pretty reliable recipe, I think. [ Without warning, she attacks him with a swift poke to his belly -- where she knows he's ticklish. ]
[ He hesitates to finish that sentence, his mouth agape. She said the magic words that cause his eyes to flicker from red to green. He wants to say it wasn't painful. He decided this on his own. For a reason that would make him happy.
He didn't get what he wanted, in the end. ]
You... know about her now.
[ He can feel his breath catching, the air turning colder out of fear of rejection. And the worst part about it.
Our class.
That's the way she refers to it. But she's wrong. It was never their class to begin with. Hinata Hajime was just a lowly reserve course student. And the Nanami Chiaki in front of him is just a construct of ones and zeroes turned real. No -- she was always real to him. But he can lay out the facts clearly.
They were never a part of that class. Not now, not ever. But the fact that he said "now" means that he knew. He knew for a while now. Although he isn't sure if the Nanami Chiaki that he sees here, in person, will realize that.
[ She rolls onto her belly to stare at the wall, envisioning the dream again in her mind's eye. The group convening around their sensei as she re-entered the classroom, everyone praising Nanami and smiling and laughing together...
She takes Hinata's hand and replays the memory in her mind for him, so that he can see. Because he wasn't present for this, and even if there's something a little sad about them sharing a memory that neither of them had... it's a little bit of happiness, too. And she wants to share that with him. ]
I have so many questions... [ She says it quietly, her eyes closed now as she remembers every little detail for him. ] I'm so curious about her. And about me! And,
[ She squeezes his hand gently. She's not mad at him. How could she be? ] And I want to know everything, if you'll tell me.
[ She sees the memory and he immediately tenses up -- noticing something and realizing the meaning behind it. That's right, Komaeda had told him that he had been suspended; the memory itself doesn't seem that long, however - in fact it doesn't tell him much besides the fact that Yukizome was apparently gone from the classroom for a certain, undetermined amount of time.
There's a lot of questions raised by it all, however... That's not important right now, he feels. ]
You can ask them, Chiaki. But... she was one of the reasons why I decided to become Kamukura.
I couldn't have. [ Hinata shakes his head, quiet as ever as his lips press together, tense. The air becomes somewhat gloomy, dropping slightly in temperature as he speaks. ]
She was the first friend I had. My only friend. I was the player two to her player one...
[ He can feel his voice cracking, the air growing cold with every syllable. ]
I-- [ His voice catches and he shakes his head. He won't say it. It would only hurt her more. ] I knew her for a very short time. But you could say that I admired her. I took her words to heart. I thought that by becoming Kamukura, I could stand side by side with her. As equals.
I wanted to become the 'me' that I could be proud of, but also... the 'me' that could tell her that I had this amazing talent. That I could stand side by side with her and not seen as dirt.
[ Chiaki listens with surprise and apprehension, almost unable to believe what she's hearing. He had done this for her... well, for this other version of her. ]
She... probably missed you very much...
[ She goes quiet and looks down to take his hand, turning everything over in her mind. ]
I don't know very much about talent... as Kamukura, you probably knew more than any of us... but I know what it's like to do anything for your friends.
I was so afraid for all of you on that island ... because you all were my first and only friends, you know, until I came here. And you'll still always be my dearest ones. Especially you, Hajime.
And ... I know what it's like to never feel like you're enough. [ She gives his hand a gentle squeeze. ] You always have been, to me, and I think you were to her, too. Although you weren't really doing it only for her, right? It was for you, too...
[ His voice is unwavering, as he not only takes that hand into his, he uses his other arm to wrap it around her waist, pulling her as close as he can. Half of it is because he wants to remind himself that she's real. That she's alive. That she's not an illusion like before, because the thought of that frightens him the most. That this was all in his head the whole time. ]
You... protected all of us. [ There's a tremble in his voice as he holds her tighter, closer to his chest. ] You never betrayed us. You were always real to me. It doesn't matter that you were a computer program created by the Neo World Program or whatever, or an artificial intelligence. You were always more than that to me.
You always mattered.
[ He has to shift the conversation to anyone, anyone but the other Nanami Chiaki. He can't think about her now. Because then he'll worry more about what could have been, the questions that are whirling around in his head. The conflict shows in his telltale ahoge, dropping slightly even as the temperature tries to become something a little more stable. ]
I still... don't remember everything. I vaguely remember that I was preparing for the Kamukura Project for six months. I was on my own. I was isolated. Sometimes I would just lie in a bed and think.
[ "For people like you who have no talent, you don't need to think. If you live life idly, groveling before your betters, nothing can make you happier."
"See you later."
"Okay, see you tomorrow."
Scenes play in his head and he can't help but wince a bit at it. He can't stop them from flooding through, however. ]
You're not... wrong, though. When I made that choice. I said to myself that I wanted to live the life I wanted to lead. I wanted to become the protagonist of my own story. To become someone who I could be proud of.
That's why you [ He stops, choking on his words. Damn it. He wants to be cool but instead, the starts of tears at the edges of his eyes. He can hear his voice echoing the words in the recesses of his mind. Insistent.
"I will become a version of me that I can be proud of around Nanami."
He really did-- ] You... don't have to apologize.
[ He really did love her, didn't he...? It's something he realizes now that simply makes his heart swell in pain, agony, sorrow, feelings that make the temperature drop again, gloomy rain clouds appearing over Hinata's head. He can't seem to control himself. Not when he's this upset. ]
[ It's a good thing she's so addicted to touch, because she presses as close to him as she can. She wants to feel as real as she is, curling her arms around him to hug him tightly. He and Nagito are her anchors, pulling her closer all the time to the world of reality and sensation. She breathes him in.
And she feels the memories flowing from him, closing her eyes as she watches them. Sees herself, but not quite herself. (She looks happy. Good.) She feels Hinata getting beat up and winces at each hit, hugging him even tighter. ]
It'll never be okay, what they did to you. [ She feels that never-ending loneliness from him, and the grief. A torrent of emotion, and she soaks it up, returning what affection and empathy she can. Grieving with him for lost futures. ]
But it's happened, and we can't control that anymore. Just what we do next. And I'll be there every day for you, Hajime. Right here.
[ She presses a hand to his heart, and then her forehead. It might be cheesy, but she never claimed to be an original anyway. And it's what she feels.
If they're ever ripped apart again, perish the thought - she'll always love him, and vice versa. ]
[ He manages to choke out the words, his heart feeling like it's nearly about to shatter. He has to lean in a little bit in order to press his forehead to his own, affectionate. With eyes closed he brings a hand up to dispel the rain clouds -- he doesn't want to accidentally have it pour in this place. ]
I'm just scared sometimes, you know? That maybe you'd disappear. That maybe when we went back home I wouldn't be able to restore your data -- things like that.
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2016-08-16 06:30 am (UTC)It's weird. The eyes don't really bother her all that much. ]
Missed you too. It's been a while since we've all been together much, really... [ And she'll savor what she can get. ]
Did you find him?
no subject
Date: 2016-08-16 06:38 am (UTC)[ He raises a brow before laughing a little at her popping the bubbles. It's cute, and that affection causes him to - this time on purpose - make more of them appear. ]
I think we know where he is. It's a bit dangerous in that place, so you have to be careful, but I think if we brought some more people capable of using Dunamis... we might have an easier time. There was definitely a lot of distrust in the area. Plus, it's not protected like this island is. So we couldn't stay there too long, otherwise our emotions would be drained out... and it would probably be worse for me to gain apathy than the rest of the group.
And not just because it would kill us.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-16 06:41 am (UTC)[ She keeps lazily popping bubbles. It's been a long day, okay? But she at least knows that Nagito's good enough at Dunamis at this point to be useful. ]
Oh! [ She sits up on an elbow to look at him. It's not the important thing to talk about -- yet -- honestly she should be more worried about it, but... with him she really isn't? ] I was going to ask! If I could call you Hajime.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-16 06:45 am (UTC)[ The bubbles just stop right there as his eyebrows hide in his hair, rather surprised for a moment until. . . his face turns red. The kusamochi just starts falling by the bucketload.
Ah. ]
I-If you want to, I... don't mind. Only if I can call you- [ Okay, be cool, Hinata Hajime! For once in your life. Be cool. ] Chiaki, too.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-16 06:48 am (UTC)Yes-of-course-you-can-call-me-Chiaki!! [ IT KEEPS HAPPENING
But she's laughing, too. And the curling up brought her closer to him. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-08-16 06:52 am (UTC)Ahaha, sorry about that Na-- I mean. Chiaki. [ There's more affection in that one word than anything else. How long has he yearned to call her by name? Too long. ] I'll eat all of it, don't worry. It's my favorite food, so even if we refrigerate it, it probably won't be there for very long.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-16 06:55 am (UTC)[ She holds up another one, slowly uncurling as she looks the kusamochi over. Wow there are quite a lot of them. ]
I guess I know how to make them, too. It's a pretty reliable recipe, I think. [ Without warning, she attacks him with a swift poke to his belly -- where she knows he's ticklish. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-08-16 06:59 am (UTC)[ But his words are cut off as he pokes her, the antennae atop his head jolting upwards in surprise as more kusamochi fall from the sky. ]
O-Oi, what was that for?!
no subject
Date: 2016-08-16 07:03 am (UTC)[ She shuffles a little closer and embraces him again. ]
I won't do it again. Mm... on purpose, anyway.
[ She hesitates and brushes the hair out of his eyes, so she can look at him better. ]
Your eyes are red. [ It's not concern, or happiness -- just faint curiosity. And a statement of fact. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-08-16 07:12 am (UTC)[ ... ]
About the day I became Kamukura. What I thought about, the reason why. What I heard from the scientists.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-16 07:20 am (UTC)Ah... the memories are coming faster now, aren't they? What a painful one that must have been...
Do you know, Sonia-san remembered another one just last week. I saw it too -- it was almost like a waking dream.
We dreamed of our class, and another me. Isn't that strange?
no subject
Date: 2016-08-16 07:37 am (UTC)[ He hesitates to finish that sentence, his mouth agape. She said the magic words that cause his eyes to flicker from red to green. He wants to say it wasn't painful. He decided this on his own. For a reason that would make him happy.
He didn't get what he wanted, in the end. ]
You... know about her now.
[ He can feel his breath catching, the air turning colder out of fear of rejection. And the worst part about it.
Our class.
That's the way she refers to it. But she's wrong. It was never their class to begin with. Hinata Hajime was just a lowly reserve course student. And the Nanami Chiaki in front of him is just a construct of ones and zeroes turned real. No -- she was always real to him. But he can lay out the facts clearly.
They were never a part of that class. Not now, not ever. But the fact that he said "now" means that he knew. He knew for a while now. Although he isn't sure if the Nanami Chiaki that he sees here, in person, will realize that.
Or maybe she already has. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-08-17 03:11 am (UTC)[ She rolls onto her belly to stare at the wall, envisioning the dream again in her mind's eye. The group convening around their sensei as she re-entered the classroom, everyone praising Nanami and smiling and laughing together...
She takes Hinata's hand and replays the memory in her mind for him, so that he can see. Because he wasn't present for this, and even if there's something a little sad about them sharing a memory that neither of them had... it's a little bit of happiness, too. And she wants to share that with him. ]
I have so many questions... [ She says it quietly, her eyes closed now as she remembers every little detail for him. ] I'm so curious about her. And about me! And,
[ She squeezes his hand gently. She's not mad at him. How could she be? ] And I want to know everything, if you'll tell me.
WAIT SPOILER WARNS FOR SDR2 + DR3 WHOOPS
Date: 2016-08-17 03:20 am (UTC)There's a lot of questions raised by it all, however... That's not important right now, he feels. ]
You can ask them, Chiaki. But... she was one of the reasons why I decided to become Kamukura.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-17 03:44 am (UTC)I guess I don't know enough yet about everything to know why you would. So I'm curious about that.
[ She turns a curious gaze on Hajime. ] Did you know her well? Did she have a good life?
[ And where is she now, she wants to ask - but all in time. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-08-17 04:52 am (UTC)She was the first friend I had. My only friend. I was the player two to her player one...
[ He can feel his voice cracking, the air growing cold with every syllable. ]
I-- [ His voice catches and he shakes his head. He won't say it. It would only hurt her more. ] I knew her for a very short time. But you could say that I admired her. I took her words to heart. I thought that by becoming Kamukura, I could stand side by side with her. As equals.
I wanted to become the 'me' that I could be proud of, but also... the 'me' that could tell her that I had this amazing talent. That I could stand side by side with her and not seen as dirt.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-17 11:49 am (UTC)She... probably missed you very much...
[ She goes quiet and looks down to take his hand, turning everything over in her mind. ]
I don't know very much about talent... as Kamukura, you probably knew more than any of us... but I know what it's like to do anything for your friends.
I was so afraid for all of you on that island ... because you all were my first and only friends, you know, until I came here. And you'll still always be my dearest ones. Especially you, Hajime.
And ... I know what it's like to never feel like you're enough. [ She gives his hand a gentle squeeze. ] You always have been, to me, and I think you were to her, too. Although you weren't really doing it only for her, right? It was for you, too...
You went through so much... I'm sorry.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-17 04:16 pm (UTC)[ His voice is unwavering, as he not only takes that hand into his, he uses his other arm to wrap it around her waist, pulling her as close as he can. Half of it is because he wants to remind himself that she's real. That she's alive. That she's not an illusion like before, because the thought of that frightens him the most. That this was all in his head the whole time. ]
You... protected all of us. [ There's a tremble in his voice as he holds her tighter, closer to his chest. ] You never betrayed us. You were always real to me. It doesn't matter that you were a computer program created by the Neo World Program or whatever, or an artificial intelligence. You were always more than that to me.
You always mattered.
[ He has to shift the conversation to anyone, anyone but the other Nanami Chiaki. He can't think about her now. Because then he'll worry more about what could have been, the questions that are whirling around in his head. The conflict shows in his telltale ahoge, dropping slightly even as the temperature tries to become something a little more stable. ]
I still... don't remember everything. I vaguely remember that I was preparing for the Kamukura Project for six months. I was on my own. I was isolated. Sometimes I would just lie in a bed and think.
[ "For people like you who have no talent, you don't need to think. If you live life idly, groveling before your betters, nothing can make you happier."
"See you later."
"Okay, see you tomorrow."
Scenes play in his head and he can't help but wince a bit at it. He can't stop them from flooding through, however. ]
You're not... wrong, though. When I made that choice. I said to myself that I wanted to live the life I wanted to lead. I wanted to become the protagonist of my own story. To become someone who I could be proud of.
That's why you [ He stops, choking on his words. Damn it. He wants to be cool but instead, the starts of tears at the edges of his eyes. He can hear his voice echoing the words in the recesses of his mind. Insistent.
"I will become a version of me that I can be proud of around Nanami."
He really did-- ] You... don't have to apologize.
[ He really did love her, didn't he...? It's something he realizes now that simply makes his heart swell in pain, agony, sorrow, feelings that make the temperature drop again, gloomy rain clouds appearing over Hinata's head. He can't seem to control himself. Not when he's this upset. ]
You never did anything wrong. Not to me.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-17 04:41 pm (UTC)And she feels the memories flowing from him, closing her eyes as she watches them. Sees herself, but not quite herself. (She looks happy. Good.) She feels Hinata getting beat up and winces at each hit, hugging him even tighter. ]
It'll never be okay, what they did to you. [ She feels that never-ending loneliness from him, and the grief. A torrent of emotion, and she soaks it up, returning what affection and empathy she can. Grieving with him for lost futures. ]
But it's happened, and we can't control that anymore. Just what we do next. And I'll be there every day for you, Hajime. Right here.
[ She presses a hand to his heart, and then her forehead. It might be cheesy, but she never claimed to be an original anyway. And it's what she feels.
If they're ever ripped apart again, perish the thought - she'll always love him, and vice versa. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-08-17 09:16 pm (UTC)[ He manages to choke out the words, his heart feeling like it's nearly about to shatter. He has to lean in a little bit in order to press his forehead to his own, affectionate. With eyes closed he brings a hand up to dispel the rain clouds -- he doesn't want to accidentally have it pour in this place. ]
I'm just scared sometimes, you know? That maybe you'd disappear. That maybe when we went back home I wouldn't be able to restore your data -- things like that.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-18 02:26 am (UTC)[ It slips out before she can stop herself. A small laugh escapes her and she hugs him with both arms now. She isn't letting go of him yet. ]
I've been learning to have a fear of death, I think. It wasn't something I ever really though about it before. Anyway, that's what Nagito calls it.
[ She shakes her head to get the hair out of her eyes. ] It's okay!! We might not live forever or be together forever, but...
I want to make the most of what we have.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-20 05:37 am (UTC)[ He can't help but agree, really -- scratching the side of his cheek with weird awkwardness. ]
We should go on a date sometime. Probably. Just the two of us.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-21 09:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-08-21 10:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-08-27 05:18 am (UTC)Okay.
[ Her only other response is to snuggle back into him, radiating excitement and warm joy. ] I'll do my best to hit all the flags!!
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