[ His voice is unwavering, as he not only takes that hand into his, he uses his other arm to wrap it around her waist, pulling her as close as he can. Half of it is because he wants to remind himself that she's real. That she's alive. That she's not an illusion like before, because the thought of that frightens him the most. That this was all in his head the whole time. ]
You... protected all of us. [ There's a tremble in his voice as he holds her tighter, closer to his chest. ] You never betrayed us. You were always real to me. It doesn't matter that you were a computer program created by the Neo World Program or whatever, or an artificial intelligence. You were always more than that to me.
You always mattered.
[ He has to shift the conversation to anyone, anyone but the other Nanami Chiaki. He can't think about her now. Because then he'll worry more about what could have been, the questions that are whirling around in his head. The conflict shows in his telltale ahoge, dropping slightly even as the temperature tries to become something a little more stable. ]
I still... don't remember everything. I vaguely remember that I was preparing for the Kamukura Project for six months. I was on my own. I was isolated. Sometimes I would just lie in a bed and think.
[ "For people like you who have no talent, you don't need to think. If you live life idly, groveling before your betters, nothing can make you happier."
"See you later."
"Okay, see you tomorrow."
Scenes play in his head and he can't help but wince a bit at it. He can't stop them from flooding through, however. ]
You're not... wrong, though. When I made that choice. I said to myself that I wanted to live the life I wanted to lead. I wanted to become the protagonist of my own story. To become someone who I could be proud of.
That's why you [ He stops, choking on his words. Damn it. He wants to be cool but instead, the starts of tears at the edges of his eyes. He can hear his voice echoing the words in the recesses of his mind. Insistent.
"I will become a version of me that I can be proud of around Nanami."
He really did-- ] You... don't have to apologize.
[ He really did love her, didn't he...? It's something he realizes now that simply makes his heart swell in pain, agony, sorrow, feelings that make the temperature drop again, gloomy rain clouds appearing over Hinata's head. He can't seem to control himself. Not when he's this upset. ]
[ It's a good thing she's so addicted to touch, because she presses as close to him as she can. She wants to feel as real as she is, curling her arms around him to hug him tightly. He and Nagito are her anchors, pulling her closer all the time to the world of reality and sensation. She breathes him in.
And she feels the memories flowing from him, closing her eyes as she watches them. Sees herself, but not quite herself. (She looks happy. Good.) She feels Hinata getting beat up and winces at each hit, hugging him even tighter. ]
It'll never be okay, what they did to you. [ She feels that never-ending loneliness from him, and the grief. A torrent of emotion, and she soaks it up, returning what affection and empathy she can. Grieving with him for lost futures. ]
But it's happened, and we can't control that anymore. Just what we do next. And I'll be there every day for you, Hajime. Right here.
[ She presses a hand to his heart, and then her forehead. It might be cheesy, but she never claimed to be an original anyway. And it's what she feels.
If they're ever ripped apart again, perish the thought - she'll always love him, and vice versa. ]
[ He manages to choke out the words, his heart feeling like it's nearly about to shatter. He has to lean in a little bit in order to press his forehead to his own, affectionate. With eyes closed he brings a hand up to dispel the rain clouds -- he doesn't want to accidentally have it pour in this place. ]
I'm just scared sometimes, you know? That maybe you'd disappear. That maybe when we went back home I wouldn't be able to restore your data -- things like that.
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timeasmymeasure
no subject
Date: 2016-08-17 04:16 pm (UTC)[ His voice is unwavering, as he not only takes that hand into his, he uses his other arm to wrap it around her waist, pulling her as close as he can. Half of it is because he wants to remind himself that she's real. That she's alive. That she's not an illusion like before, because the thought of that frightens him the most. That this was all in his head the whole time. ]
You... protected all of us. [ There's a tremble in his voice as he holds her tighter, closer to his chest. ] You never betrayed us. You were always real to me. It doesn't matter that you were a computer program created by the Neo World Program or whatever, or an artificial intelligence. You were always more than that to me.
You always mattered.
[ He has to shift the conversation to anyone, anyone but the other Nanami Chiaki. He can't think about her now. Because then he'll worry more about what could have been, the questions that are whirling around in his head. The conflict shows in his telltale ahoge, dropping slightly even as the temperature tries to become something a little more stable. ]
I still... don't remember everything. I vaguely remember that I was preparing for the Kamukura Project for six months. I was on my own. I was isolated. Sometimes I would just lie in a bed and think.
[ "For people like you who have no talent, you don't need to think. If you live life idly, groveling before your betters, nothing can make you happier."
"See you later."
"Okay, see you tomorrow."
Scenes play in his head and he can't help but wince a bit at it. He can't stop them from flooding through, however. ]
You're not... wrong, though. When I made that choice. I said to myself that I wanted to live the life I wanted to lead. I wanted to become the protagonist of my own story. To become someone who I could be proud of.
That's why you [ He stops, choking on his words. Damn it. He wants to be cool but instead, the starts of tears at the edges of his eyes. He can hear his voice echoing the words in the recesses of his mind. Insistent.
"I will become a version of me that I can be proud of around Nanami."
He really did-- ] You... don't have to apologize.
[ He really did love her, didn't he...? It's something he realizes now that simply makes his heart swell in pain, agony, sorrow, feelings that make the temperature drop again, gloomy rain clouds appearing over Hinata's head. He can't seem to control himself. Not when he's this upset. ]
You never did anything wrong. Not to me.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-17 04:41 pm (UTC)And she feels the memories flowing from him, closing her eyes as she watches them. Sees herself, but not quite herself. (She looks happy. Good.) She feels Hinata getting beat up and winces at each hit, hugging him even tighter. ]
It'll never be okay, what they did to you. [ She feels that never-ending loneliness from him, and the grief. A torrent of emotion, and she soaks it up, returning what affection and empathy she can. Grieving with him for lost futures. ]
But it's happened, and we can't control that anymore. Just what we do next. And I'll be there every day for you, Hajime. Right here.
[ She presses a hand to his heart, and then her forehead. It might be cheesy, but she never claimed to be an original anyway. And it's what she feels.
If they're ever ripped apart again, perish the thought - she'll always love him, and vice versa. ]
no subject
Date: 2016-08-17 09:16 pm (UTC)[ He manages to choke out the words, his heart feeling like it's nearly about to shatter. He has to lean in a little bit in order to press his forehead to his own, affectionate. With eyes closed he brings a hand up to dispel the rain clouds -- he doesn't want to accidentally have it pour in this place. ]
I'm just scared sometimes, you know? That maybe you'd disappear. That maybe when we went back home I wouldn't be able to restore your data -- things like that.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-18 02:26 am (UTC)[ It slips out before she can stop herself. A small laugh escapes her and she hugs him with both arms now. She isn't letting go of him yet. ]
I've been learning to have a fear of death, I think. It wasn't something I ever really though about it before. Anyway, that's what Nagito calls it.
[ She shakes her head to get the hair out of her eyes. ] It's okay!! We might not live forever or be together forever, but...
I want to make the most of what we have.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-20 05:37 am (UTC)[ He can't help but agree, really -- scratching the side of his cheek with weird awkwardness. ]
We should go on a date sometime. Probably. Just the two of us.
no subject
Date: 2016-08-21 09:39 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-08-21 10:59 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-08-27 05:18 am (UTC)Okay.
[ Her only other response is to snuggle back into him, radiating excitement and warm joy. ] I'll do my best to hit all the flags!!
no subject
Date: 2016-08-27 04:11 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-09-10 09:30 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-09-10 04:56 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2016-09-13 06:54 am (UTC)